I advocate for partnership. I’m not interested in helping you hone your lady game so you can keep doing the same shit that doesn’t work, relating in ways that don’t honor your feminine brilliance and getting caught up in situations where you don't get the love, adoration and full hearted emotionally invested partner your heart craves deep down.
We play games when we don’t have the relationship skills partnership requires.
We play games when we're driven by our fears of being alone, being too much or never being enough.
We play games when deep down we believe we can't have what we want.
When we're loving from an empty cup and low self-worth we're OBSESSED with figuring out all the tactics to make ourselves MORE ATTRACTIVE without ever giving any attention or intention into what we’re ATTRACTED TO.
AND MOST OF THE TIME WHAT WE'RE ATTRACTED TO IS THE EXACT OPPOSITE TO WHAT IS GOOD FOR US AND WHAT WILL ENSURE WE KEEP REPEATING OLD PATTERNS THAT ONLY END UP IN A PILE OF TEARS AND A BROKEN HEART.
Without understanding why you’re attracted to the person who can’t show up for you, or the person that is emotionally stunted, or the person who is all talk but no action, or the person who seems good on paper but down the line doesn’t quite cut it, or why you’re attracted to and stick around in relationships where your needs are benched and not accounted for- you'll keep playing out these relational dynamics with new people over and over.
Instead of trying to become more attractive, you need to understand what's controlling the core of your attraction. When you understand the unconscious love blueprint that is actually running and sabotaging your love life, then you actually have the space to do love and relationships differently.
Lady game teaches you tactics. Tactics ensure you step over what’s true for you so you become more appealing and choosable. But tactics also ensure that there is no discrepancy or filter meaning the people who can't actually relate properly choose you and take you away from the people who can meet your needs and want to love you full heartedly. When there is no filter dating becomes a drag, relationships become toxic and your self-worth takes a beating.
Tactics work to pull people in. Tactics fail at testing for alignment, tactics fail at setting you up to build and sustain something substantial with someone.
If you start a relationship from a place of tactics and game playing, it sets the tone for how that relationship unfolds. If you can’t be your truest self and that isn’t attractive AF to someone THEY AREN’T YOUR PERSON.
But trying telling that to the unconscious love blueprint.
You want to change how relationships go for you, you have to change how you’re approaching them. You have to change how your relating inside of them.
• Partnership requires you to know yourself intimately.
• Partnership requires you to know your needs.
• Partnership requires you to know how to communicate your needs respectfully and in a way the other person can hear you.
• Partnership requires you to have the self-worth to respect and respond to their needs.
• Partnership requires you to become a life-long student of your human.
• Partnership requires you to know your wounds and tender spaces and be aware enough to hold space for these tender areas of you partner without using them against one another.
• Partnership requires you to know how to self-soothe.
• Partnership requires you to know how to co-regulate (aka emotionally soothe eachother).
• Partnership requires intentionality and vision.
• Partnership requires all of you to be seen, witness and held fully.
• Partnership requires you to trust yourself.
• Partnership requires you to honour and respect your boundaries.
So, if you want strategies to get him to commit, or text back or any of that kinda lady game I'm not your gal. I have no interest in helping you pick up, attract or manipulate the wrong people into your life.
But if you're genuinely in the camp of true love, desire a healthy, happy and on purpose PARTNERSHIP with someone who is fully available, respects, adores and cherishes your heart, your vision and your purpose and WHO you are attracted to for all the right reasons (and yes this means you'll also find them attractive), well, then I can absolutely set you up to win that kind of game.